Have you argued with anybody lately? A full out thrasher of a row or a passive aggressive disagreement? Have you supressed what you really thought and stayed silent in an effort to keep the peace while seething inside? Have you stopped talking with somebody because their views do not match your own? It’s totally cool to disagree about stuff. I regularly disagree with people and people regularly disagree with me. Opposing views are fine when you know so deeply that you are staying in your truth and likely the person you are disagreeing with is staying in theirs. When I consciously choose to talk though and listen, even actively debate opposing views it is not usually with the intention to never ever talk to that person again, to intend harm, or write them off as a lunatic with questionable views which may be different from my own. But I argued with a friend recently and barely recognised myself.
The argument lasted about 90 seconds, possibly even less. It was intense. We had never argued before. There I was rowing with a dearly loved friend, triggered by our difference of opinion about how statistics on the Covid have been reported. We boiled over into opposing views about the testing ‘system’. We both said things we regretted saying, both of us feeling warn out by restrictions, control measures and me with the foreboding suspicion that something is rotten, both of us sucked in by the division energy so prevalent of our new era. Had I been awake enough to see it at the time, our argument was underpinned by common ground. We were both tired and frustrated, our phone call took place when we were both wondering what would happen with Christmas, each of us feeling saddened by the impact of not having seen each other in person for a long time. However our common ground became splintered by the division energy which feels dominant these days. The disagreement could have stayed simply that, a disagreement between friends which is common and fine but we had both been hijacked by an attachment to being right and the wilful intent to try to persuade the other they are wrong. I hung up the phone. I was shaking, hot, tearful.
Humans in our unconscious state are obsessed by being right and proving it. Radicalized people choose to die for their perceived right beliefs and other humans are killed for having the wrong beliefs. Division kills. My friend and I both felt shitty. We apologised to each other, with more common ground arising. We both felt it senseless to let a difference of opinion about this politized virus create a wall between us. I still lover her dearly.
The System we live in perpetuates Division and conflict. Labour versus Conservative vs Liberal. Democrat vs Republican. Catholic vs Protestant. Communism vs Capitalism. Male vs Female. Black vs white. Vegan vs Meat eaters. Pro choice vs pro life. Vaxx vs Anti Vaxx. Masks vs No Masks. Lockdown supporters vs Anti Lockdown and so it goes on while we contort ourselves to try to make sense of what the f**k is going on.
The System is intent that there must be two sides (or more) and that there must be one winner who is the best. All sides must fight off the opposition to make sure they stay the best while supporters of each opposing team are subtly (and not so subtly) influenced by all media to turn on each other. There are people who can barely even be in the same room as a family member because they have differing political persuasions. These differences are simply differences, not fuel to breed division and hate. The System will hold on into its final death throes while many people choose to go beyond division.
Division keeps us separate and stuck in the illusion that we are all totally disparate entities with no connection to anything whatsoever. Disconnected from other humans as we argue about whether Boris or Keir are best to run the country, disconnected from nature as we tear up her Earth and thieve all of her ‘resources’ for ourselves, disconnected from our highest self or spirit and governed by the fretful, fearful ego. Division breeds fear, fear breeds stress, stress breeds inflammation and illness. Time for a detox.
Slowly breathe in. Slowly breathe out. Place your hands on your body. Close your eyes if you like. Sit in the silence and stillness. What do you feel? What do you hear? Is there a vision in your mind’s eye? Maybe nothing comes through…yet.
All of my meditation and Reiki self-treatments in this last week have been pervaded by One. I usually receive messages as words when I practice Reiki for my self and when I treat others but clear as day an image was revealed to me this week and she keeps coming back. A tall woman with brown hair dressed in dark purple robes. She holds her palms out towards me and cups them together. On the inside of her hands, written in gold dust is One.
Reiki means Universal life force energy. Rei for Universal and Ki for energy. But within the practice of Reiki lies a deeper meaning, an experience of which words can never do justice. Sometimes Rei is translated as spirit, spiritual or oneness. It is spiritually fashionable to talk about being connected, being as one, relating to all life as part of the one whole, but it is in the practice of connecting with Reiki and trusting the energy to reveal to us what we need to see that the truth of oneness is viscerally felt.
Oneness feels very different from division. For me it is deep peace. It is aligning with my true nature and having faith in the true nature of other people. I do believe that the majority of people on planet earth have good natures, even the ones who do cruddy stuff and I am also not naïve. There are smaller numbers of people who absolutely wish harm on others and intend to make trouble for humanity. It is easier said then done but I try to stay connected with my own light and receive guidance from Reiki, my highest self and other guides as to what to do about it for the highest good for all. Sometimes it is active activism, sometimes quiet activism; turning off the news and going analogue.
I cannot tell anybody else what to do because my truth may be different from theirs, but I can live by example and choose to hear other people, stay conscious enough not to berate them for having opposing views. Detoxing from division needn’t mean that you go all peace and love, have no boundaries or never argue with anybody again, particularly when living in 2021 and there are many things to argue about. When differences of opinion arise and are aired, see the human in front of you or behind the screen. Maybe you have something in common? As somebody who practices Reiki and is committed to lifting up myself and others, I am committed that debate does not turn to hate. I know I will falter because I am human but will get back on the horse and try again.
The more we evolve into our true selves through practices like Yoga and Reiki, transforming wounds into power and lead into gold there may be relationships that naturally end, habits that have run their course which are no longer aligned with one’s own growth. Letting go of the old can be painful but your heart will be primed to move on, or hear people out with grace.
Social media is often a hot bed for people to run their mouths and say hideous stuff to one another from behind their screens, spurring on the division energy. I would bet that most of things would not be said if they were talking on the phone or in person rather than screaming into the divisive void for the algorithms to enjoy. “It is hard to hate up close”, said Brene’ Brown. I get it, nobody can be kind all the freaking time. We are nuanced creatures with myriad emotions triggered by myriad woundings but it only takes half a beat to stop and think about how to reply to a post or whether it is worth arguing with somebody who you think is wrong on the internet. The screams into the void get louder and nobody can hear you anyway.
Projects are being set up to encourage conversation and connection between people with opposing views. The idea is not to change the other person’s mind or win a debate, the plan is to listen, talk, listen, talk and listen some more and maybe find some commonality, some connection. I especially like the sound of Make America Purple Again devised by the OneCommune network.
We humans have been conditioned to cling to our righteousness and judgements for thousands of years. Things won’t change overnight and we can only begin with ourselves anyway. Who might we be with the division volume turned down? I am looking forward to finding out while soaking up less news, less propaganda, more instances of astute activism and more of what the brown haired Reiki woman wants to show me.
If you feel called to uncover your connection to the oneness of the universe and seeing connection where there once was division, then learning Reiki in one of my courses may be for you.